How Can I Support My Loved One During a Divorce?

Few experiences in life are as difficult as divorce. Many well-intentioned friends and family members want to help their loved one during their divorce journey but are unsure of how. The attorneys at Troy Legal have assembled the following suggestions for those looking to help a loved one through their divorce:

Listen More, Talk Less

Sometimes your loved one may need to vent or cry about what is going on in their life. Just being there as a sounding board can help them emotionally as they go through this rough period. Keep any strong opinions or judgement to yourself as you listen to them.

Stay Positive and Focused on the Future.

When emotions are running high, it’s tempting to focus on the negative. Encourage your loved one to stay positive and focused on rebuilding their life for the future. Some ways to do this are:

• Offer to help them research options for returning to school if a new degree is needed to launch a career
• Monitor for job leads on Indeed, LinkedIn, or other job-hunting websites
• Accompany them as they tour potential new homes or apartments
• Contact your network to see if anyone has a lead on childcare help

Of course, for any of the aforementioned suggestions, first check with your loved one to ensure that these steps would be welcome and not seen as an intrusion.

Include Them in Social Events

Going through a divorce is a lonely experience. Invite them out to coffee, to dinner with your family, for a walk in the park, or whatever other activities the two of you enjoy. If they decline, try again in a few weeks. They will appreciate feeling loved and included, even if they choose not to attend.

Make a Specific Offer to Help

We often say “let me know if you need anything,” when someone is going through a difficult time. However, many people are hesitant to take a friend up on an offer like this because they don’t know what to ask or don’t want to become a burden. Instead, make a specific offer, such as “I’m happy to babysit on Thursdays after school if you need a break,” or “I can come by Sunday morning to help you weed the garden.”

Encourage them to Seek Professional Help If Needed

A significant life event, like a divorce, can trigger anxiety or depression. If your friend is showing signs of either, it’s important to encourage them to seek professional help. Some signs of mental illness include:

• Loss of interest in previous hobbies or activities
• Feeling of helplessness or hopelessness
• Change in eating, drinking or sleeping habits
• Difficulty with focusing or with making decisions
• Mood swings[1]

The attorneys at Troy Legal understand that divorce is more than a legal process. We are available to our clients any time they have questions or just need to talk. We fight aggressively and counsel our clients compassionately.

Troy Legal, P.A. was founded in 2009 and serves clients throughout South Florida. Troy Legal, P.A., specializes in Marital and Family Law, providing reputable legal services for prenuptial and co-habitation agreements, paternity cases, adoption matters, alimony and child support, time sharing and parenting plans, drafting of qualified domestic relations orders (qdros), mediation services, equitable distributions, collaborative law, post-judgement modification and enforcement, domestic violence cases, and dissolution of marriage or divorce.  Troy Legal, PA. .is dedicated to serving clients through compassionate and aggressive representation, while upholding the highest degree of ethical standards.

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[1] Harvard Health Publishing, Harvard Medical School. Are you missing these signs of anxiety or depression? – Harvard Health. Accessed September 5, 2021.